Uh oh…It’s 10:47 and I’ve waited until the last minute to write. I’ve gotten myself into the bad habit of waiting until I climb in bed to write. Tomorrow I’m going to turn over a new leaf – I’m making myself a promise. I can’t settle on a topic. I could write about how the moon is so bright again tonight. It is shining in my bedroom window. I feel like I should reach up and give the pull-chain a tug. I have also thought about writing about how I am ready to see and hear the signs of spring. Yesterday I was taken by surprise when our school secretary came on the PA system and announced that due to the fact that the wind chills was minus 10 degrees we would be having indoor recess. Indoor recess – the two most dreaded words in an elementary school. It is one week into March. Yet, this week the temperatures have been more January-like. It has been a great winter for ice skating and pick-up hockey games on the frozen pond out my front window. Very Norman Rockwellian, actually. But, I think I’m even ready to say goodbye to the ice rink.
I also thought about writing about how I am a sucker for animals. I currently have four cats. Not by choice. If your have cats you know they choose you. All four of my cats were strays. They adopted me. I also have a three year old Golden Retriever. When the weather gets a little nicer I will resume my runs with my Golden. He has gained a little weight this winter from too few runs and so have I.
I could also write about being the parent of two teen boys. How for so long they are the center of my universe. My life is consumed with their activities and their aspirations and their growing pains. When Tanner left for school last year he left such a vacuum in my life. I thought about him nearly every waking moment. Yet I had to bargain with myself to refrain from daily texting. I knew I needed to give him some breathing room. He put up a wall between us. He needed to create some distance. I know he went through some tough times last year. He was never completely candid about how he was doing. He kept his “game face”. I think he really wanted to tell his Dad and I that he was capable. And he was. He made it through that tough freshman year and was determined to return to campus this past fall. He grew up so much that first year. It’s easier the second year. I’ve grown to trust him more. I’ve also learned to be careful with my communication. No guilt. No pressure. Just let him know that I am thinking about him and am here if he needs me.
I recently read that revision is where the real writing begins. I am writing daily now, getting into a new habit. They say it takes 21 days to make a new habit stick. Here’s to Day #7!